Monday, December 28, 2009

Relationships and Love... one and the same or two different entities all together?

I had a reader, yes a reader other than my mother, ask if my experience with the elderly couple "changed my view of relationships on love?".

Not being the most grammatically correct individual I will take it as is and answer the question as written... First of all I have to recognize that relationships and love are not one in same. You can easily have a relationship and not love the person, in fact, some relationships I have down right despised whoever had put my panties in a bunch; metaphorically speaking of course, if I let you put my panties in a bunch literally, chances are I don't despise you -but there are a few exceptions.

You can also love a person and not have a relationship with them... unless you count me dry humping the $30 full sized cut out of Edward Cullen I bought my mother for Christmas a relationship , bottom line is, I'm in love with the blood sucker but we don't have a relationship.

E.C. if you happen to read this and have a thing for busty red heads give me a neck nuzzle.

But no anonymous reader, that incident did not change my "view on relationships on love" but rather solidified the type of love that I may, I say may, want.

Were they happy? Who knows? Devoted? Yes. Does the fact that you feel devoted to someone mean you are in love with them? I have no fuckin' clue.

The definition of love has changed since those two love birds in the hospital first courted each other... or whatever process old people went though to finally get laid. We as 20-30 somethings were raised by 60's fun/free/bra burning hippies with the reminisces of ideals from their parents. Generation X or Y or Ythefuck... whatever you want to call us, has had the added pressure of feeling the need to get married, have children, settle down and contribute to your 401K the moment you step out of diapers/college graduation gown.

You wonder why the fucking divorce rate is so high? I don't.

I'm not saying marriage is bad, I like the idea of holding someone that I "love"'s hand on their deathbed and feeding him/her soup appeals to me... yes, there was a "her" in that sentence - why limit yourself to 50% of the worlds population?

I'm just saying that we shouldn't feel the need to conform to what our parents and grandparents did because we were raised and surrounded with a much broader spectrum of ideals, ideas and possibilities then they were. We as a generation need to shed the 60 year old coat that was placed on our shoulders and walk naked on our own path. We don't have a WWII to forcefully shape the dynamic of our relationships. We have the internet, disease, the threat of nuclear war fare, Ann Coulter and our own under publicized war to mold how we think and interact with each other.

My point being... as winded as it may be, is make your own path. Go with what feels good and right. Keep personal goals in mind and your life will gravitate in that direction naturally. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, get married because you think that you should or because of pressure from your parents or grandparents... live your life the way that feels natural and fun and your love will naturally hone in on the appropriate relationships.

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